But could even pick up of fish covered crushed put it mouth. She squinted contentedly said:
"Zimu, you're so good picking restaurants! this."
Cheng Zimu poured glass of lemon water: "Take your time, be careful choke."
"How you know preferences?"
"I noticed you choose when we ate together before."
I stared disbelief. food?
But first date, clearly told me rarely ate things.
The impact of warm scene me made vision darken for several seconds. Suddenly remembered an insignificant detail past.
When we weren't dating yet, guitar club dinner, accidentally ate of meat that looked but extremely spicy. It made me up cough uncontrollably.
That's when bottle of mineral water handed me.
"Can't handle food?"
I nodded. After drinking half bottle, see girl crescent moon She laughed:
"Then you're missing out on so much fun!"
It Shu.
So actually food, but accommodate me, claimed eat for all years.
The warm restaurant lights reflected off pristine floor, making me dizzy.
When regained composure, they were already leaving. clung his arm, looking up "Let's come here next time. it."
That beautiful smile be recipient of that too.
During year, when needed field for on intangible heritage, insisted on accompanying me traditional pottery workshop.
We stayed there two weeks. enthusiastically made teacups, clay bowls, teacups names clumsily carved on them, though mine shattered an argument.
On last morning there, clung arm like looking up eyes:
"Let's come here next time. it."
Next time?
I never took back.
5
I them shopping, but wandered aimlessly city until spotted Li café.
She sat brown sofa wearing beige dress, laptop her. This first seeing since death. like memory, remained elegant beautiful.
Gu Li high school classmate. Before Shu, for four years. But loved humorous rich boy outclassed me completely family background alone.
After confession rejected post-graduation, that guy abroad him sophomore year.
When we met breakup return, smiled: "Zhou Yao, you've changed so much."
At that time, still harbored uncontrollable longing for white moonlight. Trying calm, asked:
"Oh? what?"
"More handsome, mature, successful."
After started own By reunion, already company. The of commerce transformed me into someone new. My labels now included:
Handsome wealthy.
But person accompanied rise Shu.
I wonder if all successful become like recklessly pursuing white moonshadows first loves, repeatedly accepting invitations.
Looking back, it probably resentment unwillingness dismissals.
But realize. To avoid being faithless, even be one break up.
Only left understand feelings for Li were just nostalgia filtered time, for required departure recognize.
Through Li as no different any passerby life. Whether coming or going, felt nothing.
Only made me pray countless times year, willing pay any price for another chance love.
When stumbled back Shu's apartment, just finished up curled on sofa unpacking purchases.
The coffee table covered small boxes containing crafts. She always little trinkets shopping. their value gold or art.
"These happiness! Imagine having these home so warm! sunflower? It'll make you of me!" She'd said, holding sunflower decoration cheek, adorable warm.
That sunflower stayed on office desk ever since.
When take "warm" items. Yet still cold. that warmth came presence.
And probably never feel that warmth again.
6
I accept losing like We were just arguing never Why it lead eternal separation?
This year, never reminisce me. Now she's new life. envy that man, hate how he's overwritten memories.
I refuse believe their happiness will The honeymoon always ends. emerge. change all, that's how we drifted apart.
